July 31, 1998
Editorial
Hello, and welcome to the
long awaited second edition of the "Phoenix Sun". I realize it's been almost two
months since I first introduced this newsletter, and even though my intentions
were to post an edition monthly, it seems that time has been a very rare
commodity for me lately.
One reason for this has been my recent commitment
and involvement with a local publishing company called "Hinda-Jonathan Productions", as it's
advertising quote states, a "small New England publishing company with large
global visions".
I first met the owner, Hinda Paquette, at a Boston Gift Show
at the Bayside Expo Center a few years ago. I believe it was in 1996, as I was
first venturing out into producing my own digital production company. More about
this in the "Gallery Update" column.
Often, time seems to pass us by at
an ever-increasing rate,..it does for me anyways. I often wonder if this is a
personal perception or if time itself is indeed accelerating. It seems like just
yesterday I was gearing up for the beginning of the summer and introducing a
June newsletter. Before I knew it, ..I was another year older,... July is here
and practically gone, and the "dog days" of August are upon us. During the past
few months I have had a chance to take a few small but important steps in
balancing and stabilizing my personal affairs since having one of the most
turbulent, unsettling, yet mystifying and wonderful experiences of my life over
this past winter.
For those of you that have been following the Gallery,
you know that last June I embarked on a personal journey while creating the
series, "Faces of God", that led me
from a quaint New Hampshire town to the Yosemite Valley of California in
September, to a mountain rural community called Oakhurst, California,... then
back to Boston in November arriving on Thanksgiving day. An unforgettable
Christmas came and went as experiences gained continued to expand my
consciousness horizons,..stretching them to unbelievable limits and testing my
own sanity with questions of delusion. On one cold and confusing day in Febuary
as I was struggling to make sense of it all, and although this won't make much
sense to anyone that has not read my introspection, I once again turned to
the "Dancing Star" and read,...
"What, after all, did the king do? He
watched his conduct carefully and turned his face southward solemnly. Nothing
more."
It was a confucious reading. For the life of me I couldn't
figure out what this meant. The reference to "the king", really bothered me.
Since my journals have not yet been updated and posted on this web site to cover
this time period, its hard to convey the whole story and some of the
circumstances that I was struggling under. And until I do this, it will be
impossible for anyone to understand let alone myself. If anyone has done any
serious soul searching through past life regressions, they can at least
understand this much, and how unbelievable it can all be for the pragmatic
mind.. I recall telephone conversations from Oakhurst California in October to
Holly in Texas, (a.k.a. MoonEssence, the writer for the gallery) and a very
close friend of mine, Barb, back in New Hampshire.. I have referred back to
these conversations many times in my mind, and I can clearly remember telling
them that I had to follow this through. That I had to take this to the limit and
test the full experience no matter what the consequences were,... to find out
just who I am and whatever purpose I may have in this world. At one point I can
recall telling Moon that it was time for me to "test the other dimensions"....to
step through the 3d physical barriers. A few days later, and under many other
surreal circumstances that I have since written about in my journals, I was to
meet Dean Patterson, an initiate of the Tibetan Master Djwhal Khul, whose
personal claim, as well as from others, is a "communicator and liason between
Men and Gods". This is what was written on his personal card that was given to
me the first day I met him. I went on to study with Dean for six weeks and ended
up taking the second initiation according to Tibetan Principles and was Baptised
at "Celestial Waterfalls" on November 21st. On the back of "Initiation: Human
and Solar", one of the many books that Dean has since given to me, it defines
initiation and states:
"An initiation is an expansion of
consciousness- a means of opening the mind and heart to a recognition of what
already exists in reality.
One of the great values of this book is that
it stretches the mind towards a new conception of the intense activity involved
at all levels of consciousness on the planet to create conditions in which
evolutionary growth can proceed. The work of the planetary Hierarchy, and some
of the responsible workers within the Hierarchy, is outlined in a way which
brings every human life into focus as an outer expression of qualified purpose
through the Ashrams of the Masters. The inter-relationship and interaction of
the many kingdoms and centers of consciousness are revealed as tending towards
the complete integration and alignment of our Planetary Logos within the
systematic whole."
The few remaining hours after my baptism I said my
goodbyes, plans were made of returning in the spring, and at five a.m. the very
next morning I started my 3,000 mile trek back home. Time past,..and during this
one particular cold new england winter day in Febuary, the references to 'a
king" were at the very core of my confusion. Not only from this lastest passage
that quoted "a king looked solemnly southward" from the "Dancing Star", but
several other sources and references to a king throughout the entire journey. In
one such documentation is a set of recorded audio tapes that were explained to
me somewhat by Dean right prior to leaving California. Upon returning home Dean
sent me a copy of these tapes and during three days in January my life stood
still.
Also during this same time, I was to learn of the term and
definition of "Stichomancy" that explained why the readings from the "Dancing
Star" had become so significant to me.
Stichomancy is the practice of
seeking metaphysical insight into the world by reading a random passage from a
book. An important type of Stichomancy is Bibliomancy, which restricts itself to
holy books.
Needless to say, one month later during a streak of
extreme synchronic events, I continued this journey southward to the Tennesse
Valley, to Tampa Bay and Sarasota, Florida, then back to Boston. One week later
I found myself on a plane to Oakhurst and Yosemite once again, only this time is
was for seven days before returning to Boston. By this time it was April and
spring was in the air, a winter barely experienced. After covering almost 10,000
miles in six months of traveling, what I experienced and learned during this
time has since changed my life and my very perception of life within this
universe forever. But more importantly,.... life within myself. Another quote
within the "Dancing Star" (which I have just discovered today while writing this
editorial) describes it best when it says,..
"The real voyage of
discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new
eyes".
In a quote from my Journals one day last November, a week
before my initiation, I wrote,
"Today nothing seems the
same,...everything looks and feels differently,..it's like poking my head above
the clouds and seeing everything differently for the very first time. Everything
is different,..and along with this I realize that nothing will ever be the same
again."
I began to document this journey from the very beginning in
my written introspection, "Portraits
in Meditations", on June 23rd of last year. Even though the journals have
not yet documented the journey in it's entirety,.. in time, it will portray an
innner and outer journey of completion,..one of total personal
transformation,...one of order from chaos. It is becoming increasing clearer day
by day on just how significant and relevant this is not only for my life,...but
for every human life on this planet. It is no wonder why the lessons of
transformation are so important to humans now as we are approaching a new
millenium and the "Age of Aquarius". Life simply cannot be sustained by this
planet much longer the way that it exist today. We have raped and pillaged
Mother Earth for too long.
It's hard to believe at times that it has been
over a year since I began documenting this journey. But in many ways, it seems
like lifetimes ago. During the weeks following my return back to Boston in
April, I began writing "Spiritual Insights" that were posted at my web site.
These were, in a sense, current extensions of the journals I began last year.
This newsletter is but another extension of the journals and insights. Consider
these editorials but the lastest chapters of the introspection. In time,..all
that was experienced during this journey, ...and what I have learned
since,..will be revealed through my journals and this newsletter. If not for
anyone else, but for myself. To see it in it's totality. At times it all seems
so overwhelming. During these past few months I have had to step back and shut
down, still trying to comprehend the reality of what I experienced. At
times,...not even wanting too, ...in a way,..it was all to absurd,...even to me.
Had I gone too far?. Not just in physical distance,..but inward?. By the time of
my second and last visit to Oakhurst in April,....the revelations, insights,
synchronistic events, intuitions and vibrational frequencies were so intense, I
found myself on a mountainside alone sobbing profusely like I had never done
before. A few days later I held my last "study session" with my "soul team,"
....made the last documentations via audio recordings and realized my job was
done,...my journey complete for the time being,..and it was time to go home to
stay.
Many times since I have thought of the best way to go about
expressing my experiences. At times I feel I must lead a dual life with noone
knowing what has gone on with me, especially my family and those closest to me.
There may be some that would ask,.."What does a newsletter have to do with an
Art Gallery?" I am an artist, hence it is all part of an expression being
relayed through a series of images, songs, writings and recordings. There are
audio tapes, recorded music, photographs, books, hundreds of pages of documented
journals, and artwork,..all with bits and pieces like parts of a huge jig saw
puzzle that needs to be put together. There are many individual links hidden in
the compounds of this web site that tell portions of the story. I have many
times since attempted to put it all together but had not yet returned lately
from an uninspired, neutral position to regain forward momentum. Sometimes one
needs to take a few steps back in order to move forward again. This has been a
time when I had to concentrate on restoring order to a life of duality in chaos
when everything else had to be put on the back burner to simmer. Broke and
broken, it was time to rebuild. And even though there is still a long way to go
in restoring my life in order and reimbursing all those that have helped and
stood by me along the way, I am slowly and in very small increments, making
forward progress. Responsibilities to my family are slowly being restored.
Attempts at restoring my comittments as a father are being made. Personal
integrity that was once at an all time low is on the rebound. Social
interactions are once again being embraced where I at least feel comfortable in
leaving my own house. Physical conditioning is slowly on the mend. Fear is
diminishing and being replaced with love and tolerance. Patience in dealing with
family illness is increasing. Pain and suffering is succuming to reason. I have
grown a garden of herbs and vegetables and once again I feel whole. I am a
planter, a harvester, ....a farmer. I am Dejon, with the faith of a mustard seed
that can move a mountain. I am SunSpirit, searching for my lost identity and
finding it within the "Solarian Legacy". Did you ever feel like someone knows
something about you that you didn't know, or had forgotten about yourself? In
1977, upon graduating High School, a good friend of mine wrote in my yearbook,
...."To Brown,...from the Sun...your friend, Peter". It was meant as a play on
words, but today,..it takes on a whole new meaning. Slowly and steadily, I am
once again the "king" of my own domain,...manifesting my own life. I am slowly
regaining control of my own destiny, ...co-creating my own reality,.... refusing
to play the role of the victim any longer. Experiencing a transformation the
likes of what thousands of others are doing today. Soon,..the entire planet will
have to confront it's own existence.... It's own mortality. There has been many
times when I questioned that what I was experiencing was to 'far out",..to "far
fetched" to be an acceptable reality. But when I return to the everyday reality
of how this world functions today,..i realized it is this "reality" that
is unacceptable. ........We are killing this planet........ We have co-created a
planet that is polluted and dying from the very "reality" in which we have
created. In so doing we are killing ourselves and suffering with pain and
sickness,... creating deseases and cancers in which we have no known cures.
Meanwhile corporate powers profit off our misfortunes while western medicine
cannot even define it's own symbol of creation,..the caduceus...the very symbols
and origins of healing and transformation itself. I have learned that this is
not an acceptable reality. This is the world that doesn't make any sense. I will
have the faith in any alternate reality that has to deal with co-creating life
within this cosmic conscious universe before I succumb to a world which destroys
the very essence of our being in how we live and adapt as human beings. If the
entire system needs to fail and be dismantled in order for life on this planet
to be restored the way it is meant too,..then so be it. I for one am prepared.
If the Y2K phenomenon turns out to be more then just an "end of millenium"
fallout of fear....then let it be. Those that would survive will build a new
world based on the principles of co-creating life as it is meant to be,...order
out of chaos,..and I will be there. There is a long way to go in restoring the
faith of sustained life on this planet and it all comes down to each and every
one of us to confront our own lives and determine our own futures through
positive co-creation. None of us will have a right to enter the utopian era of
the "Aquarian Age" unless we change our own way of living. I for one can vouch
on how difficult it is for one to "look within the mirror" and to see oneself as
we really are. There will always be those that fail to look at themselves and
find it a lot easier to blame someone else for their own short comings. As one
who has sacrificed a lot by taking a good look at my own life, I am an easy
target for those that fail to do this for themselves. I know how freightening
this can be and how difficult it is to like what we see when we take a good look
at ourselves. It is so easy to judge others then it is to judge ourselves. It is
also a lot harder to follow through and make amends to those that we have used
or crossed in our path. It's an on-going process. Each and everyone of us must
confront our own fears,..or own realities,..and re-create what has been
forgotten. This we can do not by the "miles of distanced traveled",...but what
it is we see,..what it is we see with new eyes. By establishing a new paradigm
in the way we think. We must awaken to our "Solarian Legacy" in order to
survive. Survival is a simple word with little meaning until it is thought
about,...and it is usually then when it is in question.
I was recently asked
a question concerning the re-emergence of the interest in the Angelic Kingdom
and Mythology. I responded with a very simple answer. If anyone knows anything
about the meaning of a cosmic "myth", you will know that a myth is not what we
"think" it is. A myth is a "truth",...a Noumenal Truth that is "hermetically
sealed". We are on a re-emerging course with cosmic truth. We are re-awakening
to our stellar past and remembering just who we are and our purpose for life on
Earth. This edition of this newsletter deals with the beginning blueprints of
our "Solarian Legacy". It deals with the principles of the very existence of
universal consciousness itself. This edition is an extension of my journals, my
experiences of the past year, and one more small step in relating the whole
story. A real life, true story,..not one that wraps itself in fiction, but one
that makes an attempt to confront the very barriers that binds us,..whether it's
a pretty picture or not,..the fact remains,..it is real life. This edition is a
long awaited blueprint of a threshold. In the few months to come and the several
editions to follow, I will follow up on what has been written within these
pages. Pay particular close attention in this edition to the topic and column of
"Science and Spirituality". Enjoy.
Jon-William
Artist
SunSpirit
Graphics
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